As schools have in all earnest re-opened, learning has started. Our children will learn certain things in their classrooms. However, our responsibility to teach does not end with dropping off the child at the school gates. In the home, parents have to set a good example in their conduct and realise that children are good observers of their actions. Parents have to be keen in making sure that their children grow up with sound moral values and not influenced by negative traits picked up here and there along the way and from amongst peers.
The Messenger of Allah Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam is reported to have said: Allah Ta’aala will ask every caretaker about the people under his care, and the man will be asked about the people of his household.” (Nasa’i and Abu Da’ud) Good upbringing of children in our care is a responsibility and teaching of manners is central to it.
A famous saying of Abdullah bin al-Mubarak (RA) goes: “I spent thirty years learning manners, and I spent twenty years learning knowledge.” In no particular order of importance, below are a selected seven moral values that we can bequeath to our children, yielding returns without measure, insha-Allah.
Civility costs nothing but it’s worth much. The Messenger of Allah Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam said, It [Hellfire] is forbidden to touch a man who is always accessible, having polite and tender nature.” (Tirmidhi)
In the home situation, it should not be hard for a son who learns by hearing a father saying ‘sorry’ to a mother. “…No one is humble for the sake of Allah without Allah elevating him.” [Muslim]
The Almighty commands us: “O ye who believe! Stand out firmly for justice, as witnesses to Allah, even as against yourselves, or your parents, or your kin, and whether it be (against) rich or poor: for Allah can best protect both. (Qur’an 4:135)
Abu Dharr Radhi-Allahu anhu reported that the Messenger of Allah Sallallahu alayhi wasallam said: “Your smile to your brother is a sadaqah (charitable act) for you. (Tirmidhi) So, do not respond to your child’s smile with a hostile: “What’s funny?!”
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